“You” Is the Problem

If you observe and listen very carefully and honestly, you will notice that rarely does a moment go by without the arising of some sense of insufficiency, some kind of feeling that “something is wrong with me,” or “something is wrong with my life,” or perhaps even “something is wrong with the world.” Almost like lightening, it is quickly followed by “I know what I want” — I know what will get rid of this feeling of inadequacy and conflict — some material, financial, sexual, spiritual, social, political, circumstantial, or psychological “thing” that will save me from this uncomfortable feeling. That, in turn, is quickly followed by a massive circus of mental scenarios and mutterings, of desires, hopes, expectations, worries, fears, frustrations, and disappointments. Even if I get what I think I want, the sense of completion and relief is inevitably only temporary. Why is it like this?

What gets lost in the shuffle is the simple fact that all of it, the feelings of lack and incompleteness, and the endless remedies to the situation, are nothing but the play of memory and fantasy, the replaying of old mental video and sound bite versions of “me” and “my life.” All of it is nothing but fragmented thought, and in this there is no lasting relief, simply because thought is by nature fragmented and incomplete. Thought doesn’t know what you are, and it doesn’t know what your life is. It thinks it does with the same myopic arrogance, presumptuousness, and judgmentality of the evening news, but it has no more understanding of the whole organic interactional flow of life than television does. All thought can do is search its memory banks of static images and repetitious opinions (for or against), all of it accompanied by a vast deluge of emotional and physical responses as well as replays, heavily edited by motive, of interactions with other people and the environment. But there is no life and no love and no wisdom in any of it. Why? Because it is an escape and an avoidance of what is.

If you watch and listen to it for awhile, you will observe the whole history of humanity, our ignorance, dishonesty, and confusion, our insensitivity, violence, and cruelty to each other. Perhaps it will deepen your understanding and compassion for all sentient beings. It may be inevitable, though, that at some point you get will fed up with it, realizing what a stale, monotonous, meaningless distraction it is.

At this point, there may be an opening. If you are ready to come to terms with the simple fact that you do not know what you are, and you do not really know what the universe is, or what your life is, then the amazing, delicate, subtle and intricate truth of reality is free to reveal itself without bias. The constant interaction and transformation of all things will be self evident, as well as the infinite context in which it all happens. This is what you are! This is wonder and awe and blessedness itself.

-Scott Morrison-

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